Learning to Meditate Like a Monk/Nun

So I did it! I learned (as did the other 59 meditators) how to sit like a monk/nun for an hour, 3x a day without moving an arm, leg or opening an eye! Whew… One of the keys is the notion of impermanence, but more on that later.

And this was the result of a 10 day Vipassana course - 10 days of Noble silence meditating 10 hours a day!

It was mind blowing

Mind numbing

Amazing

And at times I wanted to scratch my eyes out and run away…

And yet, I would highly recommend the experience! And if you are contemplating doing this program, I would suggest that you go in with the determination to finish regardless of how uncomfortable you may be, combined with an attitude that you can do anything for 10 days!

Here are the nuts and bolts:

• What: 10 Day Vipassana Meditation Course

• Where: At a beautiful, yet simple retreat center in the mountains 2.5 hrs NE of San Francisco

• Length: 10 days of program + 2 travel days (it’s a commitment)

• Accommodations: Monastic but comfortable. The cabin held 4 with a shared bathroom and shared cleaning responsibilities. I was given a small room with a single firm bed, an overhead light complete with a side table and lamp. I was lucky enough to have a room to myself either out of deference to my age or mere luck. I’ll never know. Oh, and only 2 of us finished the course from that shared cabin - harbinger. And I learned that this retreat center is pretty nice compared to others around the world. Just FYI.

• Noble Silence: Until 9am on Day 10. Noble silence means trying to avoid a smile or even a head nod to another. We were to be in our own experience and not compare it to another.

• https://www.dhamma.org

  
  

Daily agenda: 

4am Wake up bell 

4:30-6:30 Meditate in your room or meditation hall (In complete transparency, I slept through a couple of bells. I always made it for the 5:30am sitting, but probably only ½ of the 4:30am sittings.)

6:30-8 Breakfast and rest

8am Group meditation in the hall

9-11 Group meditation in the hall or your room

11-1 Lunch and rest

1-2:30 Group meditation in the hall or your room

2:30 Group meditation in the hall

3:30-5 Group meditation in the hall or your room

5-6 Tea/fruit and rest

6pm Group meditation in the hall

7-8:15pm Dhamma talk

8:15-9pm Group meditation in the hall 

10pm Lights out

• Cost: $0

Yes, you read this right. The cost is zero $. The entire organization is run by volunteers and financially supported by donations from prior students. The teachers, cooks and servers are all onsite during the entire course giving of their time without compensation so that others, regardless of one’s financial situation, can learn this ancient technique. This is the purest form of sharing an experience that I can imagine. No one is financially gaining in any way from this program….

The notion is that we are having a monastic-like experience (sans shaved head and beads) and to receive alms (food/lodging) from others helps one’s ego to dissolve. Humbling, and a pure motive of Dhamma - one of the backbones of the course.

And lest you not think I’m one of the few crazy ones, I had attempted to get into this program many different times at one of the 150 centers around the world, but to no avail. The classes had ALWAYS been full, but serendipitous timing was on my side this time… And after we left on Sunday, the next class was arriving on Wednesday. Impressive volunteer organization.

And I’m kinda’ embarrassed to admit this, but I didn’t really know what I was getting into. I have had friends complete the program so I knew it wasn’t a cult, but didn’t really know much more than it taught a fairly prescriptive form of meditation.

We were told in advance that if we wanted to participate that we would be asked to willingly follow the mediation practice in the format that was taught. They acknowledge the many other forms out there, but for these 10 days, if we were to attend, we were to follow this practice only. We would also be asked to turn over on day one: phone, electronics, books and all writing material, and that physical activity would be limited to walking - not even any yoga… Now I knew all of this advance, but holy shit this part scared me. What was I going to do with myself………??

One thing that really had me concerned was all of the sitting - the lack of physical movement made me more than a wee bit worried. And yet, the end result was that I felt better upon leaving than when I came! (Didn’t see that one coming…) I did some mental calculations and realized that out of a 24 hour day, I would awaken at 4am and be in bed by 9:30pm which meant I would be up for 17+ hours a day. Of that 17 hours I would ONLY be meditating 10 hours. I had 7 hours to do other things. Funny how my mind was seeking consolation…

The food was plant based, filling and yummy, and there were 10-15 minute breaks between sittings which gave me time to stretch and jump to keep my blood flowing. Oh, and the center was built on the side of the mountain and hosted a series of well manicured labyrinth-like trails that traversed up and down that mountain. I found out later I was known as the walker as I made my rounds during each long break - hence actually feeling stronger at the end than at the beginning.

Crazy unintended consequences…

But those were just the side effects. The real work - the program was the showstopper.

This Vipassana technique was what Buddha became enlightened to while sitting for 40 days under the Bodhi tree. Funny how I’m drawn to the Buddhist tradition, though the dogma of the various sects continue to be a turnoff for me. The contemporary man that spread this Vipassana training was from Burma/Myanmar (Satya Narayan Goenka) and a successful businessman. This specific teaching had been lost to much of the world and could be traced back to Buddha; this is the technique he taught to alleviate suffering.

The backbone of Buddhism is that humans experience suffering because of attachment. We crave/attach to an outcome and when it doesn’t happen, suffering  arises.

What Buddha discovered when he became enlightened was that the brain and body receive information that come from our 6 senses (sight, smell, sound, touch, taste and thought) and from these inputs, the body creates physical sensations. It’s the sensations that our mind either craves or has an aversion to and by retraining the mind to notice the sensations and simply observe them before reacting, one can find deep peace through a chosen and thoughtful response.

Sounds too simple - right?!

The notion of impermanence and equanimity are also of vital importance. The rising and falling away of the sensations is an important notion to grasp. This too shall pass….  And learning how to feel the sensations without craving or having an aversion to them is easier said than done.

We sat for hours scanning our bodies. Feeling the sensations. Training the mind to become sharper and sharper. Training the mind to pay attention to the sensations. Going from the gross to the subtle.

• An arm itches

• A muscle twitches

• A heart beats

• The mind thinks

• Cells divide

• Particle swirl

And realizing the body is ALWAYS moving was an obvious yet amazing aha. We just don’t get quiet enough to notice, and so we spent 10 hours a day scanning our bodies - and getting quiet.

Real quiet.

And sitting like a monk/nun… On the first several days, the meditation hall was full of a cacophony of sound as 60+ people adjusted their legs, moved pillows, coughed or sneezed. If we experienced an intermittent period of 30 seconds of uninterrupted silence in an hour-long sit, the silence was palpable. And yet, by the end - sitting with determination - we were ALL able to sit for an hour 3x a day without moving. And the silence was amazing.

And this happened bit by bit each day.

Day one was the simple practice of an anapana - focusing on the breath and watching the mind dart like a sprinkle of water on a hot skillet! 

Day two we learned to narrow our focus and feel the sensation of the breath on the upper lip.

The narrowing of the focus continued and the Vipassana technique was introduced as we learned to calm and quiet our wandering mind.

By day 5 the notion of sitting with determination was introduced. I had squirmed and adjusted my meditation pillows for several days as I found that there is a subtle difference between discomfort and pain. A 6 month old new hip could sit, but not for an hour. It started to scream after 30 minutes. I moved to a chair for sitting with determination - a straight spine, eyes closed, not moving the hands or legs, and by the end I could sit for a good 50 minutes in a cross legged position on the floor - without moving.

And yes, there was discomfort. We were reminded over and over again of the notion of impermanence. Sensations rise and then they fall away. The most crazy, visceral experience I had was on day 3. I was scanning my body part by part and was focusing on my left eye brow attempting to notice sensation when suddenly I felt a tickle in my right ear. The internal dialogue went something like this:

There’s a tickle in your right ear.

“I’ll get to you ear when it’s your turn.”

But there’s something alive and moving in there!

”Wait, Is there really something in there??”

And with that, a finger got stuck in the ear searching for that living thing!!!!!!! Of course nothing was in there, and I swear to god I heard my mind laughing at the observer. It had won that round…

But eventually, the observer was able to just be present with all of the sensations calming the trickster mind. If my hip or knee started to ache, I would remind myself that this too shall pass, and 90% of the time it did. By the time my mind moved to that particular aching body part to scan it, the ache had passed. And if the ache was still there, by giving it attention, softening, breathing into it - it always passed away. C R A Z Y.

I had some experiences that were visceral, and yet my rational mind still wonders if they really did happen?

• Body disillusionment

• Past life regression

• Kundalini rising that went beyond anything I had experienced before!

• Messages from a friend who had past

  
  

I know that all of these sound pretty unbelievable, and had I not experienced them I would probably feel the same skepticism. It all sounds so hokey when you put it in writing, and yet…. I felt it. Was it merely my mind playing tricks on me, or had I gotten to the other plane of existence quantum physics tells us exists?

So if you’ve made it this far, you may be asking yourself why. Why did she do this? Why would I do this? And those are fair questions. I am a collector of experiences and knew that this one would require a certain amount of resiliency and discipline yielding personal growth and insight. I do know that I am more grounded in the present and am able to feel the bodily sensations more acutely, allowing me to breathe into whatever is arising, and hopefully my responses are more measured.

And maybe the answer to “why,” is merely - why not….??!

And Noble Silence for 9+ days was a thing. The underlying reason is that each persons’ experience is unique to them - neither good nor bad - neither right nor wrong - and if you were to talk and compare your experiences to others, just as you are reading this and wondering if your experiences may be similar, know this. It won’t be anything like mine.

Your experience would be perfect for you.

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